What did Jesus mean when He confirmed, as the greatest commandments, these words of the Old Testament: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind'. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments" (Matt 22:37-40)? At the core of these commandment is an assumption: Self-love is a gift of God's creation unique to human nature. But, as with all of the natural gifts given to us by God, self-awareness expressed as self-love may be abused by sin or redeemed by Christ for the glory of our Creator.
Jesus, being fully human, reflected the natural needs that underlie self-love. He needed a sense of belonging, a sense of security and a sense of worth. God the Father met those needs at Jesus' baptism when he declared, "You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased" (Mark 1:11). By naming Jesus as His Son, God gave Jesus a sense of belonging; in hearing God's expression of love for Him, Jesus received a sense of security; the declaration of His Father's approval gave Jesus His sense of worth.
Every human being has these same needs. Their satisfaction is the basis for self-esteem and the essence of wholesome self-love. Granted, a sense of belonging, security and worth are not easy to come by in today's world. But here's the good news. They are satisfied in the prior demonstration of God's love for us: "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8).
God's love within us is the source of a healthy self-love. And this is possible, "because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us" (Romans 5:5). Only through this experience, however, is it possible to enjoy and express a wholesome self-love. Otherwise, love of self will naturally degenerate into sinful selfishness.
SELF-LOVE IS A SPIRITUAL QUESTION THAT DEMANDS AN "EITHER-OR" ANSWER
Jesus said that all the Law and prophets "hang on" the commandments that speak of love—for God, neighbor and self. He also inferred that the fulfillment of these commandments anticipated His saving work in human lives.
Jesus came to fulfill the promise of our fulfillment as human beings. Fulfillment is possible, however, only through the forgiveness of our sins and the surrender of our total self to the will of God. Two momentous truths confront us in these experiences.
The first truth is that God must be the center of our love. Our personalities are defined by the focus of our affections. If our love is centered upon ourselves, we become little gods in the image of Satan. If, on the other hand, the center of our love is upon God, we become His children in the image of JesusChrist. Our Character becomes defined by the center of our love. The choice is ours to make. Will we serve as our own gods—centering our worship on the love of self? Or will we center our lives in God, opening ourselves to His love and devoting our love to Him?
The second truth is that we are to love God with our whole being. Heart, soul, mind, and strength—every facet of human personality—are to be given in love to God. The heart represents our emotions, the soul our spirit, the mind our intellect and the strength our physical body.
John Wesley likened the Christian personality to a house. He said that the forgiveness of sins is the door to the house and the filling of the Spirit is the presence of God occupying every room. If heart, soul, mind and strength are the rooms of our being, then Christ must be "at home" in every nook and cranny.
When the love of God reigns supreme, the human personality is transformed, by grace, from an idolatrous shrine of self-love to a sacred temple filled with love for God and graced by the presence of the Holy Spirit.
SELF-LOVE IS EXPRESSED IN OUR RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER PERSONS.
According to the commandments of love, these relationships must extend both vertically to God and horizontally to other person. Frequently, persons omit one or the other, or get them out of balance.
Love can only flow between persons. Those who make God only a higher power or a life force cannot love their God. Christians, however, who know God as a Person, can express their love to Him and for Him in the most intimate of ways. What greater love can flow between two persons than when we cry, "Abba, Father"? In this moment, the Scripture tells us, "the Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's Children" (Romans 8:15-16).
Redeemed self-centered in God in communicating from person to Person is the grandest of all human relationships. Because love is the bonding agent, this is far more than a command. It is our privilege and blessing!
It is not enough, however, to express our love in a vertical relationship of communion with God. We must also demonstrate our redeemed wholeness by loving our neighbor as ourselves. And who is my neighbor? This was the question that the scribe asked Jesus after He quoted the commandment of love. The Gospels reveal that Jesus included a wide circle of persons in answering this question.
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus commanded His disciples to love their enemies (Matt 5:43-44). Later, in the parable of the Good Samaritan, He extended that love to strangers (Luke 10:27). Still later, He focused upon His disciples when He admonished them, "Love each other as I have loved you" (John 15:12). Finally, on the cross, He showed the same love for His mother when He said to Mary, "Woman, here is your son," and to John whom He loved, "Here is your mother" (John 19:26-27).
Now we understand why the rich young ruler turned away from eternal life. Jesus upsets every preconceived notion that he had and we have about loving ourselves....and relating to enemies, strangers, friends and family. Only from the strength of redeemed self-love can we give ourselves impartially and sacrificially to all of those whom Christ identifies as our neighbors.
Loving ourselves is a dangerous doctrine. It can result in sinful selfishness. Contemporary society has chosen to test the extremes of self-interest, and we are reaping the whirlwind of blatantly selfish choices. Sadly, the contemporary Christian church has not been exempt from these insidious influences of self-interest. We see its glorification in our worship, or work and even our witness. Jesus' commandment of love cuts across both our social and church cultures with a surgical slash.
Unspeakable joy awaits us if we give ourselves to God; experience the outpouring of His love into our hearts through the fullness of His Spirit; and sacrifice ourselves without prejudice for the good of our enemies, strangers, friends and family.
